Very clever of you, John! I must confess that I have now some somehow smart phone - not the famous brand for which the CEO makes a million dollar a day, but nevertheless a phone that can do more than making a phone call. So maybe I have been partially trapped too!
B-b-but the iPad 38738476, now with the improved technologies such as retina display, femur casing and the new, awesome anal port (that's right folks, you can try and cram anything into it, it will only make your device cringe and everything that comes out is utter sh*t!). Now for only $999999,99 (white version, with 16GB of unusable memory, since you can only connect to Apple and nothing else). And because we're racist, the black version, which does the exact same thing is now $200 more expensive. Order now! Oh, and this is the most innovative commercial ever! [link]
If there was something like a Grammy or an Oscar for commenting on dA, you'd have won, hands down. It was a pleasure to read, and mirrored my own sentiments.
Oh, and not to forget: be quick to have that anal port licenced as your invention, or Apple will crap allover you at some not very distant point in the future. In cold blood, they would claim it was their idea. And that you're trying to rip them off. No Sir, it was your idea, I testify to that, any detrimental claim is therefore declared invalid.
Why, thank you, good sir! It's great to see people appreciate sarcasm and humor no matter the form, size or color it comes into. Also, the anal port technology is quite endangered by Apple and Apple only. Come to think of it, the next time I come up with a very, very bad idea about something that is useless, unpractical, unsafe and utterly wrong (and should be killed with fire) I'll make sure to apply for a post as a Designer/Engineer at Apple. That way, people can enjoy overpriced and over-hyped products even more and maybe I can make a buck or two